Things We’ve Learned in Tanzania- Part 2

Here are the final 60 things we’ve learned during our time in Tanzania. This was a group effort and not an exhaustive list.

61. When walking in the rain, you have two choices, fall in the drainage ditch or fall in a huge puddle.

62. Honey tastes like alcohol.

63. The pool guys can predict the weather better than the weathermen.

64. You can never have too much bread and butter.

65. Math majors only do good.

66. If there is a chance of rain, it means it will rain.

67. We are the only country in the United States that teaches math.

68. It is impossible to drink out of a Nalgene without spilling on yourself.

69. Our bladders are directly related to the quality of the bathroom and/or hole.

70. The number of wives a Maasai has is directly proportional to the number of cows he owns.

71. The best food is a simple vegetable broth.

72. Zack is the only one who can get girls’ hair free from the thorn tree.

73. We don’t get tan lines, we get dirt lines.

74. Grand Valley would dominate Survivor: Tanzania.

75. There are hand signals for the colon in number 74 above.

76. There are three different words for flamingo and none of us no which one is correct.

77. Ponchos will never catch on as a fashion statement in Tanzania.

78. Never take your backpack on a six and a half hour hike if it is not absolutely necessary.

79. Euchre is played everywhere, including the top of a mountain.

80. White shoes do not last more than 20 minutes.

81. When you don’t have a television, geckos are the best entertainment.

82. Power can be shut off nation-wide, by choice.

83. When hiking, there is a significantly greater chance of stepping in poop than not in poop.

84. Climbing a mountain is easier than hiking to a canyon.

85. Our parents were right, it is possible to travel uphill both ways.

86. We share everything.

87. The only way to prevent blisters is to not walk. Ever.

88. You can make anything out of a banana.

89. If you ride in the back of the safari vehicle, you will hit your head on the window at least once.

90. People say you’re welcome before you even say thank you.

91. If you don’t have bruises after the first day of safari, you’re doing it wrong.

92. Six Immodium is not too many.

93. You know it’s going to be a long day when you break your first piece of chalk on the first word you write.

94. We will never know what side of the road to walk on.

95. One little leaf can make a whole lot of racket on a tin roof.

96. You can never have enough mints. Well, Zack can never have enough mints.

97. Cody has a husband face.

98. Your passport pouch goes under your shirt.

99. Long bathroom breaks are a cry for moral support.

100. Diana is a walking drugstore.

101. You can be in the middle of Africa and learn about proper dinner etiquette…outside in.

102. If you can’t find your driver, he is probably throwing rocks at the lions.

103. Even given the chance to sleep in, we still wake up at 6:15.

104. You can take a cat down a mountain in a box and have it survive. Nice work, Bahati.

105. People say sorry even when it’s not their fault.

106. There really aren’t any problems in Tanzania. Hakuna matata.

107. Always offer half.

108. A slice of pizza can be passed down the table and touched by 9 people before being graciously accepted.

109. Sun tanning on the equator is dangerous, but gets the job done quickly.

110. You will always have a passport pouch tan line. Just accept it.

111. Ice will never again be taken for granted.

112. It is common practice to mop outside.

113. There are wild hedgehogs in Tanzania.

114. Mzungus can beat Africans in a football game.

115. You will never be able to pronounce all of your students’ names.

116. Lions claim everything, even safari vehicles.

117. You don’t need 100 pictures of zebras, but you can’t help yourself.

118. You’ll never know if a car honking means hello, get out of the way, or go ahead and cross. Just pick one and commit.

119. There are no boundaries when you live with the same people for 26 days.

120. Maisha Marefu


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